Without You
by Jameson Rook
Summary: "When Danny showed up at Steve's house with a duffel bag in one hand and a six pack of Longboards in the other, the intent was clear in his eyes as he walked in without being invited; they would both stay up too late and drink too much, and maybe, just maybe, forget that they had almost died." Spoilers for 3x06


_**Disclaimer: Hawaii 5-0 and all of its characters belong to Peter Lenkov and CBS Studio Productions. **_

_** SPOILER: 3x06 "I Ka Wa Mamua (Borrowed Time)"**_

_** I'm sure that there are enough of these fics to last a lifetime, but I have to do my own little spin on it. I'm hoping that you guys aren't totally bored of them...**_

_** I just started watching 5-0 on the episode where Danny and Steve were on the boat and got boat jacked, so I'm not exactly well-versed, but I haven't noticed Steve wearing his dog tags...does he? Because my father wore his constantly when he got out of the Navy, and my husband wore his before he passed (now I wear them everyday), so it would make much more sense for Steve to wear his...sorry, that's just my curiousity.**_

_"My heart breaks with every beat, I can't explain what you do to me._

_So, just say you'll promise me, please, take me if you ever leave._

_But the thought of you gone makes everything wrong in my life,_

_So, stay right here, right now._

_'Cause without you I'm a disaster (The moment you go),_

_And you're my ever after (Just thought you should know). _

_'Cause I need to know your answer, (Just say you'll stay with me)._

_I want you to say you're gonna stay with me, (Just say you'll stay with me)._

_I die every day that you're away from me._

_So, just say you'll promise me, please, take me if you ever leave._

_My heart breaks with every beat, I die every day that you're away from me."_

_-"Without You" My Darkest Days_

When Danny showed up at Steve's house with a duffel bag in one hand and a six pack of Longboards in the other, the intent was clear in his eyes as he walked in without being invited; they would both stay up too late and drink too much, and maybe, just maybe, forget that they had almost died.

They had gone through the beers within an hour of sitting out on the lanai, sitting in silent consideration that they both could have died that day. Gracie could have lost her Danno _and_ her Uncle Steve in one shot. It was just...too much for either of them to handle, so they drank. It was how 'men handled their issues'. Once the beers were gone, they had moved on to the scotch that Steve kept stashed away in a cabinet for a 'special occasion'.

_"Hey, we both get to keep breathing and they don't have to look for our limbs two blocks away. That's a special occasion, right?"_ Steve had tried to joke, but it fell short under the somber tone of his voice. They sat and watched the waves crashing over the sand of Steve's private beach until the scotch was nearly half gone.

"How was the dance?" Steve finally questioned, the first statement that hadn't had to do with drinking since Danny had shown up.

"It was good. Gracie had a good time. She looked beautiful." Danny replied with a small smile around the rim of his scotch glass. Steve watched him out of the corner of his eye.

"I'm sure you were pretty too, Danno." He replied, turning his head to fully look at the scowl that his partner gave him.

"I think I looked rather dashing, smartass." Danny dug in his pocket before pulling out his phone and thumbing through pictures until he found what he was looking for. He grasped the arm of his chair to keep himself upright as he leaned over and held out the phone to show Steve.

The photo was one that he'd had Rachel take on the front lawn before they'd left. Danny was down on a knee with his arm wrapped around Grace's waist, tucking her into his side, and she had her arm wrapped around his neck. The pink dress that she'd chosen was adorable, and Steve couldn't deny the tiny tightening in his chest at the sight of the smile that didn't quite reach Danny's eyes.

"You're right, she _does_ look beautiful." He murmured, thumbing through to the next photo. His heart nearly stopped in his chest when he caught sight of Danny in, what looked like, mid-dance move, his hands above his head, his hips cocked out to one side and his right foot extended with his toe pointed on the floor with Gracie mirroring his body. The look of pure abandonment on his face was a work of art, and Steve considered framing it to send to that fancy art museum in France they'd taught him about in high school. "Danno..." He whispered, his voice sticking in his throat.

"I, uh, you weren't supposed to see that...one of the other parents took that. Thought we looked cute or something." He stammered, pulling the phone from Steve's hands as a rosy blush crept up his neck. Steve smirked at him a moment, but decided to let it go. He'd known that there had been feelings for Danny since the day that he'd met him, but they had been somehow...solidified when he saw him standing there with that red light on his chest.

The fear that was in Danny's eyes as that beeping had gotten faster was something that would be burned into Steve's brain until the day he took his last breath. He had been in some shit when he was in country back in his SEAL days, but that afternoon had been the first time he'd _actually_ thought he might die. But, that wasn't the scary part. He was more scared for Danny.

"Danny, I..." He started, running his hand over his hair nervously.

"You don't have to do this, babe." Danny interjected, his words slurring slightly as he waved his hand dismissively. Steve scowled at him, downing the rest of his scotch before leaning over the arm of his chair. They had already been sitting closely together, so the tiny shift in his position had his arm brushing over Danny's and sending shivers through his body.

"Listen to me, Danny." He said as sternly as he could muster. Danny quirked an eyebrow at him.

"You think just cause you got these fancy dog tags," He reached out and flicked the tags around Steve's neck. "I have to listen to what you say? 'Cause I don't, Steven. I'm not in the Army-."

"Navy."

"Whatever, you're not _my_ commanding officer, so I don't have to listen to what you say." He muttered, his hand still lingering on Steve's dog tags, toying with them absently.

"Yes, you do. I want you to hear what I have to say, because I will _not_ sit here and pretended that we didn't almost fucking die today." Steve sucked in a deep breath. "When I saw you standing there with that sensor on your chest, I realized something important."

"Steve, I-."

"Just. Listen." Steve snapped, reaching out and placing his hand over Danny's mouth. Danny watched him through half-hooded eyes, and Steve just assuemd that the scotch was catching up with him. He felt Danny's fingers twining into the chain on his dog tags and the smaller man nodded his agreement, so he let his hand fall away. "When I was in the SEALs, I did't have a reason to want to come home. I was young, my family was basically non-exsistant, no relationships, nothing. I could stay overseas for years at a time, send my guys that had families home to see them, and I could continue on missions while they took their leave. When my dad was murdered and I came back to the island, I was just expecting to find the man that killed him, take care of that situation, and then leave again. That is, until I met you.

"You changed my entire outlook on coming home, Danno, because the island _finally_ felt like home again. It didn't just feel like this empty shell of what it once was. You've always called me out on my shit, and you've never let me push you around, and I love that. Then, you introduced me to Gracie. You trusted me enough to let me meet the most important person in your life, and I can't tell you how much that meant to me. I love Gracie with all of my heart, and I would do anything for her, but I knew that, if something happened to us, she wouldn't be alone. She would have someone there to keep her safe, but I didn't want to leave you there by yourself, because...I didn't want to lose you, Danny."

"I wasn't exactly keen on dying, myself." Danny tried for a lighthearted chuckle, but it came out more like a choked sob. Steve touched his forearm softly, his weapon-calloused fingers tightening softly.

"Then you told me about your partner in Jersey, and...I don't know, I just didn't want to have to go through losing someone that meant so much to me. So, I figured, if you were going to die, so was I because, as annoying as you are, I'm a mess when you're not around, Danno. I'm not even kidding, I'm a disaster. I won't lose you, Danno. I _can't_ lose you." He swallowed around a thick knot of emotion that was balled in his throat. "I love you, and I know that's probably going to freak you out, I'm not expecting you to feel the same, but I need you to know that. If you want to just forget I said it, that's fine, I just had to say it at least once." He rambled until Danny's fingers came to rest on his lips.

"You've got to learn to relax, babe." He chuckled, tugging Steve closer by his tags until their foreheads were touching. "I love you too, Steven J. McGarrett, and I'm _really_ glad you didn't leave today. Even as I was telling you to go, I knew I didn't really mean it. I can't imagine anyone else at my side through all of that."

Steve was smiling when Danny's lips landed on his, tasting of scotch, and a lingering taste of beer, and the salt of the ocean, mixed with something darker. He tasted like _his Danno_. When the need for oxygen overwhelmed them, they parted, but Danny kept Steve anchored close to him, pulling a chuckle from the larger man.

"You have a thing for the dog tags, don't you?" Steve whispered, brushing his nose over Danny's. Danny grinned sheepishly and nodded, pulling back to look at Steve.

"I love them." He muttered, running his free hand over the back of his neck. Steve reached up to his neck and pulled them over his head carefully. The metal tags jingled quietly, despite the black rubber silencers, as he lifted them and placed them over Danny's head. Danny's eyes doubled as he lifted the tags into his hand and looked at them. "Are...are you sure, Steve?"

"I want you to wear them. That way, even when I'm running around in some jungle, 'playing G.I. Joe', you'll have me with you. They'll keep you safe."

"You know, I had a necklace that kept me safe, until I met you." Steve scoffed at the statement and shook his head. "Animal." Danny mumbled, leaning in for another kiss, though the insult held no heat when he smirked into the kiss. "Oh, McGarrett, what ever would you do without me?" He joked, but the joke fell short of its mark, causing Steve to wince. He was about to retract the statement when Steve's hand moved to his cheek, his thumb brushing over his cheek bone gently.

"I would fall apart without you, Danno." He whispered, his eyes watery as they remained completely connected with Danny's. "I want you to move in here. With me. If you don't want to stay with me in my room, I understand that's moving fast, but I have the guest room, and we can set up a room for Gracie. Please?" Danny paused for a moment, his jaw hanging open in shock, but the pleading in Steve's eyes was all it took to sway him.

"Yes."

"Okay, I'll set up the guest room for you, and then we can go get your stuff tomorrow, and-."

"Steve!" Danny barked, sighing, but chuckling at Steve's babbling nervousness. "You don't need to set up the guest room."

"You...you mean...?" Steve stammered with a growing smirk.

"Yes, 'I mean', Steven. After today, I want to keep you where I can keep an eye on you. Can't have you running off to play superhero in the middle of the night, now can we?"

Steve smiled to himself as he carded his fingers through Danny's hair a moment before leading him to _their_ bedroom. He knew that he would go into a downward spiral if he ever lost Danno, but right now, for that moment, he was there; He was tucked under the comforter and wrapped in Steve's arms, snoring softly as he slept, and that was enough to ease his racing mind. It was enough to remind him that they hadn't died that day, and that he could breathe once again. It was enough to remind him to keep on living.


End file.
